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From “The Emotional Incest Syndrome” by Patricia Love with Jo Robinson.
NOTE: SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTER concerning sexual problems that stem from enmeshment with a parent. Please make note of it. For mature readers only.
The Relationship Problems of the Chosen Child
(The child within a relationship of enmeshment with a parent.)
From pages 51 – 55:
(BUY THE BOOK if you find this relevant to you!
This is a gross condensing of the main points of the text!)
Fear of Commitment
“I do just fine with women right up to the point where the word 'commitment' is mentioned. Then I feel like turning and running away. The thought of living with just one woman for the rest of my life sends me into a cold sweat.”
Problems with love relationships are the rule rather than the exception for the adult Chosen Child, and one of the most common problems is a fear of intimacy and commitment. To a person who was bound up with an engulfing parent, any close relationship can feel like an invasion. I see this trait quite frequently in men who were the favorite sons of aggressive, domineering mothers.
Lack of Romantic Attraction
Woman: “I am married to a wonderful man. He goes out of his way to please me. I couldn't ask for anything more. Yet, I'm always dissatisfied. I keep wondering, 'Where's the magic? Isn't there more to love than this?'”
Man: “I've been married three times, and I'm about to sign up for number four. I've never found what I'm looking for in a woman. All my wives have disappointed me.
The normal parent-child bond is powerful in and of itself; when it is amplified by enmeshment, it becomes all-encompassing. Unwittingly, some Chosen Children go through life trying to recapture this intensity...
